Pondering the drive

I drove to work this morning, tired and wishing that I could just go back home and curl up with Skype for another few hours. I spent a good portion of last night playing Fable, the new Xbox game from Microsoft Studios. It's not quite everything they drummed it up to be, but has some cool ideas, and is very open ended. Unfortunately it took a while to teach Skype that the Xbox controller and cable was not a play toy and that chewing on them was not acceptable.

Last night as I lay in bed before going to sleep I started to think about the coin toss yesterday. Should I have taken it? Was I right to pass? As I get older I find myself getting more reflective, more responsible, seeking more stability. Getting the condo and adopting Skype was just the beginning - now I find myself thinking more and more about the future. How will I provide for myself (and my fledgling family)? Where will I go from here? What goals do I have? It makes me wonder if I have truly lost the bright eyed innocence of youth to the clutches of American capitalism.

I drove to work this morning in a daze, watching the lights in the top of the I-90 tunnel streak down in the reflections of the Toureg in front of me. What's next I wonder - am I slated to get a big house with a white picket fence? What about a gas guzzling SUV? Next thing you know I'll be voting Republican, voting to go to war, chopping down trees.

*sigh* Has age really robbed me of my drive to make the world a better place? Have I sunk into a self centered pit? Do I care any more? Is there really more to life than getting the next paycheck and paying the bills?

Comments

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